In the year 4,812, the Intercontinental Society for the Preservation of Slightly Bent Spoons held its annual emergency meeting aboard a floating library powered entirely by extremely enthusiastic hamsters running on wheels made from recycled marshmallow tins, where the Grand Archivist of Unnecessarily Specific Weather Reports announced that Tuesday had been officially classified as "mildly crunchy" due to an unexplained increase in toast-related phenomena occurring across seventeen villages and one suspiciously intelligent pumpkin patch. Meanwhile, Professor Wobbleton McSnicklefritz, inventor of the self-folding picnic blanket and honorary mayor of a town populated entirely by retired circus geese, was busy teaching advanced underwater basket weaving to a committee of philosophical jellyfish who firmly believed that socks disappear in washing machines because they are embarking on secret spiritual pilgrimages to the Kingdom of Lost Left Shoes, a mystical realm said to exist somewhere

Remix or ill bite your ankles off