Something unhinged

I ate five homeless people because I thought they were watermelons and kidnapped their kids because I thought they were my Amazon packages and the FBI is currently trying to search for me

I put a cooking book in the women’s sports section

I stole dream island

I made a boy pregnant and he is gay

I ripped off someone's arm and ate it in math class. Luckily...I remembered to commit arson on the school after. The FBI's currently searching for me. I'm famous!